大白被乔乔从池塘里喊上来时，十分的不情愿！
它也不是傻鹅，每天在这里带着浩浩荡荡一群鸭子横行池塘，嘬水草，叨小鱼，辖下鸭群并八百鱼虾，乃池塘共主！日子不知道多潇洒。
以至于它最近都不惜得去找大王了一一大王那傻狗，天天守着后山东窜窜西窜窜，有什么好啊？那猪食那么香也没分它一口呢！
还有主人乔宝，一开始吃饼干都要分他一半，后来偷偷抠蜂蜜都只舍得给它一小坨......哼，它鹅大王已非院中小鹅，怎么会看不出他的变心？
尤其是今天上午，刚在水里扎了两个回合，它就感觉到从山上流下来的水不一样了！
就......就......
怎么个不一样法儿，大白也说不清楚，它只知道对自己特别好！一时间脚掌在水底下扑噔噔的踩水，情绪越发高昂。
然而就在此时，乔乔气喘吁吁的喊它上岸一
“大白！大白！快过来！”大白假装听不到。
乔乔又喊：“大白，快点过来！姐姐让我叫你回家！”
大白浑身一抖，被人拎着脖子甩来甩去的记忆开始攻击它了！
它一个转向，身子就丝滑的游到了岸边。
而乔乔打量它一眼，这才满意的笑了起来：“大白，你身上好干净啊，我觉得不用洗澡了，我直接带你回去吧！”
看它屁股扭扭的跑不快，乔乔一把将它搂在怀里，而后一路狂奔。
与此同时一
张燕平也赶紧趁机摸上了手机，再次替乔乔发布了预告。
虽然他的冬瓜还没涮完，但不影响，能磨叽一会儿是一会儿。
大鹅相亲，女方即将抵达！单身狗不容错过的经验！
黑乎乎还没开播的直播间：......
不是，主播这个预告什么意思呀？
大鹅相亲？是那只叫大白的特别凶的鹅吗？
女方即将抵达？好家伙，大白魅力都比我大
怎么着？单身狗现在都要跟鹅取经验了？
别说，你还真别说，我相亲都是主动约女方的，这方面我还真比不上
大白你出息了啊！
主播狭隘了啊！什么叫单身狗不容错过的经验？结了婚的也很感兴趣
今天休假，特意带着媳妇儿孩子一起看
还没开播吗？还没开播吗？还没开播吗？
张燕平盯着弹幕，乐不可支。
这会儿问宋檀：“乔乔还没回来，要不咱们先开了吧！等他回来了再讲解。”
“行啊。”宋檀不太关注这個，只是瞧着孙守平的车子停在了院子外，赶紧凑过去。
车门一开，一只雪白壮硕的白鹅就扑扇着翅膀下来了，然后屁股一摆，“啪叽”一声就拉了一坨屎。
众人：
宋檀皱起眉头：“孙哥，你这鹅..素质不高啊。”
刚打开直播间的张燕平看看那只精神抖擞的大鹅，再看看直播间，果然，听取哈声一片。
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈鹅确实，素质不高
就是！随地大小便，女方爸爸怎么不教呢？
这女方爸有点眼熟是不是？
之前给咱几个宝相亲的狗哥.....嗨，我就说嘛，原来是个媒人！
我瞅着他这职业做的不咋地，上回给大宝相那几个，都没看中
正说着呢，只见车子里又哼唧着跳下来两只毛色黑白的小边牧。
身子不大，动作却是灵活，乌溜溜的眼睛好奇的打量着周围的一切，那股子机灵劲儿简直是扑面而来。
“怎么样？”
孙守平登时忘记了刚才的插曲，指着两只小狗说道：“看着精明吧？我跟你说，边牧这家伙聪明着呢。这要是放城市里圈养啊，也不知道是狗教人还是人教狗“真可爱。”
宋檀说的真心实意的。
毕竟，大家都懂，动物幼年期总是颜值最高的时候。
这会儿她往下一蹲，两只手就那么一招呼，小边牧就哼哼唧唧冲了过来，然后围着她的手掌又拱又舔。
那股子亲昵和依赖就别提了。
孙守平：......虽然这个场面已经在自家狗场见识过了，可如今再看，内心仍然又嫉妒又酸楚呢。
凭什么呀？是他身上没沾染对狗狗的友善气息吗？怎么自己就没得这待遇呢？
他还想问问之前宋檀说的那几只退役犬，可还没开口呢，宋檀就好奇道：
“对了孙哥，刚忘记问了，你不是说一雪前耻吗？你雪前耻的办法就是给大白送媳妇儿啊？”
“你懂什么？”孙守平得意道：“像大白这种聪明鹅，我既然打不过，就得智取！”
“它不是单身吗？我带的这鹅你也看到了，多俊呢！今儿相亲要是相对眼了，晚上我就把它老婆带走。就得让它尝尝这个撕心裂肺的爱情！”
宋檀：
张燕平忍住笑，此刻盯着直播间——直播间的镜头虽然对着那只大白鹅，可孙守平说的话，那是收的一点不漏啊！
很难评，我也不知道说什么了，下一个来吧
其实，这么一听，上回咱大白叨这狗哥，也不是没理由的，可能纯粹是想要他醒醒脑
这位大哥，但凡你去点家看几本龙傲天，也不至于......
别说，我还真挺好奇，什么才是鹅们撕心裂肺的爱情？
这鹅确实挺俊的，就是感觉跟大白还差了那么几分神采
那可不？想想大白吃的比我还好，它怎么能不增神采呢？
我要是去主播家，我肯定比现在精神多了
宋檀也沉默了一会儿。
都是熟人，她真不想戳破孙守平的梦想。只能换个角度：
“那要是大白没看上它呢？”“那还不简单！”
大约是自信过头使人狂妄，孙守平侧侧头叫宋檀看他脸上脖子上的红印子：
“看到没看到没？昨天下午扇的，到现在还没消呢！你就说这鹅凶不凶悍不悍吧？”
“这要是没看上，那两鹅相见，必有一争！高低我得叫它扇大白两巴掌。一个是精神痛苦，另一个是肉体痛苦，总能替我报仇的。”
宋檀：
她大约是沉默了太久，此刻只能憋出一句话来：“你开心就好。”最近转码严重，让我们更有动力，更新更快，麻烦你动动小手退出阅读模式。谢谢
海棠书屋合作联系QQ：77889900联系邮箱：
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